Days gone by and many more to come.
He sits quietly by the window gazing at the falling rain.
Falling , like the tears he cried.
Sitting alone he waits.
Waiting for what we know not,
lest he tells us.
The words , his voice.
All full of wisdom,
all so distant.
Speaking from experience,
he advices his friends.
Do they listen ?
Close to the edge he stands,
looking down.
Will he jump ?
Alas he closes his eyes.
Takes the plunge.
Of eternal slumber.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ROXAZ CORE
navigate using the bars above
S O M E T H I N G
by Escape The Fate
So now you're running
It's hard to see clearly
When I make you angry
You're stuck in the past
And now you're screaming
So can you forgive me?
I've treated you badly,
But I am still here
Sometimes I wonder
Why I'm still waiting
Sometimes I'm shaking
That's how you make me
Sometimes I question
Why I'm still here
Sometimes I think I am going crazy
Can you help me understand?
And now you wish that you meant something
And now you wish that you meant something to somebody else
And now you wish that you met someone
And now you wish that you meant something to somebody else
(someone) (something to somebody else)
You look at me through clouded eyes
I know you see through my lies
See the sky, see the stars
All of this could be ours
Out of sight, out of mind
We've been through this a thousand times
Turn your back and then you make me feel so crazy
Can you help me understand?
And now you wish that you meant something
And now you wish that you meant something to somebody else
And now you wish that you met someone
And now you wish that you meant something to somebody else
You know I would wait forever
Yes, I would wait (I would wait)
You know I would wait forever
Yes, I would wait
And now you wish that you meant something
And now you wish that you meant something to somebody else
And now you wish that you met someone
And now you wish that you meant something to somebody else
And I'm the one that should mean something
But still you wish that you meant something to somebody else
Something to somebody else, something to somebody else.
Y O U T U B E L O V E
Roxaz's Favourites
Watch this one , it's touching.
P R O F I L E
me myself and i :D
hello :D my name is Roxaz. Roxaz loves his friends, Being utterly RANDOM, Roxaz is an absolute fan of Alesana and Escape The Fate, both of which have awesome songs. Roxaz currently studies in Republic Polytechnic and is in Diploma in Game Design(DGD. Roxaz plays BASS though not very good at it.
E I G H T E E N
RANDOM FACTS
RANDOM FACTS
well, i am 18 years old, aren't i?
ONE Roxaz loves COOKIES TWO The Gazette is an awesome band THREE Cola flavored lolipop is SEX. FOUR Proud to be in STA. FIVE RANDOMNESS FTW!!!! SIX Get Roxaz a bass guitar please... SEVEN Missing someone... EIGHT JUST SCREAM RIGHT NOW !!!!! NINE Chocolate Orea Ice Blended is nice... TEN Thinks That the clique has changed alot... ELEVEN Loves to stone... TWELVE Has AWESOME FRIENDS THIRTEEN IS in Club G FOURTEEN Combat Arms is hella awesome... FIFTEEN Shakugan No Shana is a nice anime to watch... SIXTEEN Roxaz has 2 hoodies... SEVENTEEN Did a Free Hug Campaign in RP the other day... EIGHTEEN Roxaz likes pie...
T O D O L I S T
Seek What I Have Lost
T A G B O A R D
yakkity yak yak
Getting things out of my head...
11:55 PM - Monday, July 27, 2009
A song for you perhaps ?
9:21 PM
State a song that made a major impact/change in your life.How has this impact/change affected your life now ?
-by faci Christopher
"Let's just stop , drop everything , forget each other's names and just walk away"
Now is 2009 , 2 years ago , in 2007 right about mid-year , my friend Sean introduced to me to the band Chiodos.
Im sure some of you have heard of them.
Skipping all unnecessary talks , the song that hit me most and made me cry was "Baby , you wouldn't last a minute on the creek"
There's something about the song's music video and lyrics that gets to me every time.
Talking about walking away from someone and forgetting about them pretending shit ever happened between the 2 of you.
The sadness.Forcing yourself to move on.
The video itself...gah i cant seem to find the right words to write this “RJ”
Maybe coz i have something about friends breaking up , relationship breaking up. I hate to see such stuffs happen you know.So yeah that song just struck me and still strikes me every time i listen to it.2 years gosh that’s a pretty long time for a song to have an impact on you.
Not forgetting to mention the concept of the music video gave me inspiration form y “O” level art paper 1.The fucked up-ness of a rat and a bird that fell in and out of relationship.That concept gave me what i needed for the title “DAMAGED”.
This may not have seem as much thought put into but yeah , i tried. =\
-by faci Christopher
"Let's just stop , drop everything , forget each other's names and just walk away"
Now is 2009 , 2 years ago , in 2007 right about mid-year , my friend Sean introduced to me to the band Chiodos.
Im sure some of you have heard of them.
Skipping all unnecessary talks , the song that hit me most and made me cry was "Baby , you wouldn't last a minute on the creek"
There's something about the song's music video and lyrics that gets to me every time.
Talking about walking away from someone and forgetting about them pretending shit ever happened between the 2 of you.
The sadness.Forcing yourself to move on.
The video itself...gah i cant seem to find the right words to write this “RJ”
Maybe coz i have something about friends breaking up , relationship breaking up. I hate to see such stuffs happen you know.So yeah that song just struck me and still strikes me every time i listen to it.2 years gosh that’s a pretty long time for a song to have an impact on you.
Not forgetting to mention the concept of the music video gave me inspiration form y “O” level art paper 1.The fucked up-ness of a rat and a bird that fell in and out of relationship.That concept gave me what i needed for the title “DAMAGED”.
This may not have seem as much thought put into but yeah , i tried. =\
MY EPIC RJ FO TODAY
5:57 PM - Thursday, July 16, 2009
Dear Class W14J Enterprise Facilitator , Mr.Don Tsai
Im going to be very honest in this Reflection Journal.
I really am.
But first before i begin...do you like cookies ?
If you do , i'd like to know what kind of cookies do you like ? Because im a cookie freak and i love them so very much.
And did you know that i started a Free Hug Campaign during the Year One Freshman Orientation Camp ? It was epic.I recieved more than 100 hugs.
Ok so , to answer today's reflection journal.
Yes i agree that some of the modules we're doing this semester may not directly seem relevant to our diploma.
Infact most of them are not relevant to mine at all.
I am in Diploma Of Game Design.
Modules im taking : Cognitive , Enterprise , Maths , Science and Programming.
Cognitive : I have no freaking clue how this module is going to help me with my Game Design.Ok maybe a little bit of psychology and philosophy would help me generate epic scripts for my game designing , but other than that i dont see how it's going to help.
Enterprise : No idea how it's going to help me with my diploma.
Science : Apart from physics , i dont see how the rest would help either...
Maths : I do need a little maths in my programming of the games...
Programming : This i would say , is the most relevant module for this semester and probably the core of it.
I'd need to understand programming in order to create a game.
Ok so out of the 5 modules for this semester , only 1 would help me fully , and 2 would help me in more ways than none.
How would they relate to my carreer ?
I guess i could put everything i've learnt into action.Putting the pedal to the metal.
Enterprise skills would help me bond with my colleagues.
Cognitive would help me understand the way people thinks and the rationale behind certain things.
SO i'd like to end my Reflection Journal now.
AND i'd like to know what kind of cookies you like or if you like them at all.You could include them in the comments for my grade.
Im going to be very honest in this Reflection Journal.
I really am.
But first before i begin...do you like cookies ?
If you do , i'd like to know what kind of cookies do you like ? Because im a cookie freak and i love them so very much.
And did you know that i started a Free Hug Campaign during the Year One Freshman Orientation Camp ? It was epic.I recieved more than 100 hugs.
Ok so , to answer today's reflection journal.
Yes i agree that some of the modules we're doing this semester may not directly seem relevant to our diploma.
Infact most of them are not relevant to mine at all.
I am in Diploma Of Game Design.
Modules im taking : Cognitive , Enterprise , Maths , Science and Programming.
Cognitive : I have no freaking clue how this module is going to help me with my Game Design.Ok maybe a little bit of psychology and philosophy would help me generate epic scripts for my game designing , but other than that i dont see how it's going to help.
Enterprise : No idea how it's going to help me with my diploma.
Science : Apart from physics , i dont see how the rest would help either...
Maths : I do need a little maths in my programming of the games...
Programming : This i would say , is the most relevant module for this semester and probably the core of it.
I'd need to understand programming in order to create a game.
Ok so out of the 5 modules for this semester , only 1 would help me fully , and 2 would help me in more ways than none.
How would they relate to my carreer ?
I guess i could put everything i've learnt into action.Putting the pedal to the metal.
Enterprise skills would help me bond with my colleagues.
Cognitive would help me understand the way people thinks and the rationale behind certain things.
SO i'd like to end my Reflection Journal now.
AND i'd like to know what kind of cookies you like or if you like them at all.You could include them in the comments for my grade.
I fell asleep writing this letter in red ink for you
11:23 PM - Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Alright so...here i am again with another blogpost
This time it's out of randomness , just wanted to see how long i'd last before i feel like sleeping...
And so what's been going through my mind right now ?
Well many stuffs , let me begin with the title of this post.
I fell asleep writing this letter in red ink for you...
Sounds rather sad and depressing , but there's a hidden meaning behind it...
It means "I died writing this letter in blood for you"
Emo-much ?
Pretty much yeah...like i said , im sort of backtracking my life to the point where everything was happy for me , so i have to go through this emo phase i guess o_o idk
Help me sort myself out if you can , i'd appreciate it.
Let me begin on relationship whilst the topic is pretty much related to the previous one.
This is based on my own point of view and if i were to be making any points that contradict each other , it's because im looking at things from different sides.So bear with me aight ?
Relationship.People get in and out of them.Same shit different people different day.
Some learn how to deal with em , some cling on to their loved ones , some just walk off once it's over and others just cant be bothered.
Me , sad to say im the type who clings but will slowly learn to let go once it's over.
I still cant believe myself for ever getting quite a few online girlfriends.
Long distance relationship...LDR
LDR requires tonnes of patience my friends...it really does...
I get shit from my real friends saying "What if they're cheating on you ?" or "What if she already has a real bf ?"
Those shitz will come alright , but you learn to deal with them and give whoever you're dating online the benefit of the doubt because you really cant control them or what they do seeing as it's LDR.
Even if they were to be doing those stuffs behind your back , what can you do ? Nothing
So yeah , it requires lots of patience and commitment if both parties are serious about hooking up.
I'll admit that i was serious with this particular girl...
We had this sort of open relationship but not that open (if you get what i mean o_o)
I cried over her , yes im not ashamed of admitting i cried about a girl ive never met
She was always there for me aight , no matter how hurtful my words were , she'll be there.
She'd return to me even after we broke up a few times.
I started to really see her true love , as what i'd call it
She'd just stay with me , chat with me ,make each other laugh and even was serious about hooking up and getting married.
Loving me for who i was
I loved her for this , for this care and love she showed me , this warm fuzzy feeling she gave me even though we were a thousand miles apart.
Call it whatever you want , but yeah i was serious about going to Hawaii to meet her (anyone can guess who she is yet ?)
So yeah , in the end...gah i wont talk about the end for now...talk to me personally if you want to know aight ?
As i was saying , as of that incident , i dont think i'll ever find someone like her ever again.Im still looking for a girl who would do something similar to her and i'd return her the love right back.
And i hate it when people just toy around with relationships.Getting in and out of countless relationships.Flirting about too much or cheating on someone.
Im not saying i hate flirting , idc if you flirt coz i know i do or should i say used to.But i wont take it if you just went around messing with the opposite gender's mind making them like you , then bitch about the person liking you , then just walk off like that once you're done flirting or anything that's similar to that.
i just wont take it.
Well i guess im all about committment as well eh ?
Cant be helped after what happened in my past.
With that i'll leave you guys to ponder about what kind of a person i am in a relationship...
Oh and by the way...the girl i was talking about...
her name is...
Kendralyn L Coco...my first and last online girlfriend
(last meaning ive had other girls after breakign up with her , but we got back in the end and broke up again , and i never online dated again)
Roxaz out~
This time it's out of randomness , just wanted to see how long i'd last before i feel like sleeping...
And so what's been going through my mind right now ?
Well many stuffs , let me begin with the title of this post.
I fell asleep writing this letter in red ink for you...
Sounds rather sad and depressing , but there's a hidden meaning behind it...
It means "I died writing this letter in blood for you"
Emo-much ?
Pretty much yeah...like i said , im sort of backtracking my life to the point where everything was happy for me , so i have to go through this emo phase i guess o_o idk
Help me sort myself out if you can , i'd appreciate it.
Let me begin on relationship whilst the topic is pretty much related to the previous one.
This is based on my own point of view and if i were to be making any points that contradict each other , it's because im looking at things from different sides.So bear with me aight ?
Relationship.People get in and out of them.Same shit different people different day.
Some learn how to deal with em , some cling on to their loved ones , some just walk off once it's over and others just cant be bothered.
Me , sad to say im the type who clings but will slowly learn to let go once it's over.
I still cant believe myself for ever getting quite a few online girlfriends.
Long distance relationship...LDR
LDR requires tonnes of patience my friends...it really does...
I get shit from my real friends saying "What if they're cheating on you ?" or "What if she already has a real bf ?"
Those shitz will come alright , but you learn to deal with them and give whoever you're dating online the benefit of the doubt because you really cant control them or what they do seeing as it's LDR.
Even if they were to be doing those stuffs behind your back , what can you do ? Nothing
So yeah , it requires lots of patience and commitment if both parties are serious about hooking up.
I'll admit that i was serious with this particular girl...
We had this sort of open relationship but not that open (if you get what i mean o_o)
I cried over her , yes im not ashamed of admitting i cried about a girl ive never met
She was always there for me aight , no matter how hurtful my words were , she'll be there.
She'd return to me even after we broke up a few times.
I started to really see her true love , as what i'd call it
She'd just stay with me , chat with me ,make each other laugh and even was serious about hooking up and getting married.
Loving me for who i was
I loved her for this , for this care and love she showed me , this warm fuzzy feeling she gave me even though we were a thousand miles apart.
Call it whatever you want , but yeah i was serious about going to Hawaii to meet her (anyone can guess who she is yet ?)
So yeah , in the end...gah i wont talk about the end for now...talk to me personally if you want to know aight ?
As i was saying , as of that incident , i dont think i'll ever find someone like her ever again.Im still looking for a girl who would do something similar to her and i'd return her the love right back.
And i hate it when people just toy around with relationships.Getting in and out of countless relationships.Flirting about too much or cheating on someone.
Im not saying i hate flirting , idc if you flirt coz i know i do or should i say used to.But i wont take it if you just went around messing with the opposite gender's mind making them like you , then bitch about the person liking you , then just walk off like that once you're done flirting or anything that's similar to that.
i just wont take it.
Well i guess im all about committment as well eh ?
Cant be helped after what happened in my past.
With that i'll leave you guys to ponder about what kind of a person i am in a relationship...
Oh and by the way...the girl i was talking about...
her name is...
Kendralyn L Coco...my first and last online girlfriend
(last meaning ive had other girls after breakign up with her , but we got back in the end and broke up again , and i never online dated again)
Roxaz out~
"I'll wait for the right time"
-Roxaz
Just been thinking through...
9:51 PM - Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Ever had those moments where you witness or experienced something that triggers an unwanted memory in you ?
Im pretty sure most of us have and would never like to experience it ever again...
Well to me... it just means that you've been running away from that memory not wanting to do anything about it but forget it...
It recently occured to me the other day...made me emo...well depressed...emo's too strong a word o_o i guess...
It made me realize about all the things ive been running away from because i dont want to face them or cant be bothered to solve.I guess it's partially due to this reason that i cant explain how im feeling sometimes.Because i cant be bothered to tell you people , i dont want to burden you people with my problems , afraid that you people wont be able to help me or look at me differently.
But that all have changed now , Im starting to ask for help , being more open to stuffs i would have not been open to previously.And it's all thanks to you people , people whom i call my friends.
AoCheng , Alex , Chris , Ani , Khair , Steve , Sam , Dhinesh , Serene ,Lulu and to all those ive not mentioned , you guys arent forgotten.
I'd like to say thank you to all of you for being my friends =]
Lets stay through till the end aight ?
Roxaz out
Im pretty sure most of us have and would never like to experience it ever again...
Well to me... it just means that you've been running away from that memory not wanting to do anything about it but forget it...
It recently occured to me the other day...made me emo...well depressed...emo's too strong a word o_o i guess...
It made me realize about all the things ive been running away from because i dont want to face them or cant be bothered to solve.I guess it's partially due to this reason that i cant explain how im feeling sometimes.Because i cant be bothered to tell you people , i dont want to burden you people with my problems , afraid that you people wont be able to help me or look at me differently.
But that all have changed now , Im starting to ask for help , being more open to stuffs i would have not been open to previously.And it's all thanks to you people , people whom i call my friends.
AoCheng , Alex , Chris , Ani , Khair , Steve , Sam , Dhinesh , Serene ,Lulu and to all those ive not mentioned , you guys arent forgotten.
I'd like to say thank you to all of you for being my friends =]
Lets stay through till the end aight ?
Roxaz out
Licking your blood off my dagger
-Roxaz
Pretty girl...where are you...?
11:13 AM - Sunday, July 12, 2009
=\ heys again people...
Aight so...Cosfest VIII started on Saturday 11 July which was yesterday
I don’t know why but i was feeling rather lost the whole time...
My sense of balance was not there either..
And for the entire time...i was searching for this particular girl whom i saw at the event...
I have to say she is like the 3rd girl to have made me fall in love with just by one look
~sigh~ sadly i wasn’t able to find her so im trying my luck again today...
PLEASE BE THERE PRETTY GIRL !!! =[
Lepak IG “meeting” again...ugh cant talk about it but it was hella fun though...
Whatever happened at Esplanade stays there...
Sorry to be a killjoy
Gah another one of my emo moments...
But oh wells...moving on...
Aight so...Cosfest VIII started on Saturday 11 July which was yesterday
I don’t know why but i was feeling rather lost the whole time...
My sense of balance was not there either..
And for the entire time...i was searching for this particular girl whom i saw at the event...
I have to say she is like the 3rd girl to have made me fall in love with just by one look
~sigh~ sadly i wasn’t able to find her so im trying my luck again today...
PLEASE BE THERE PRETTY GIRL !!! =[
Lepak IG “meeting” again...ugh cant talk about it but it was hella fun though...
Whatever happened at Esplanade stays there...
Sorry to be a killjoy
Gah another one of my emo moments...
But oh wells...moving on...
"Maybe i should stop running away..."
-Roxaz
Sweet Nightmarez...
8:36 AM - Wednesday, July 8, 2009
OK so i woke up the other morning , 7th july 2009 at around 4am...
Reason...no not insomnia...but coz of a nightmare...(a lil childish but yeah o_o)
Since it's Friday now...2 days after my nightmare...i may not remember much of the details despite it being a rather vivid dream...
So i'll summarise what i want and can remember...
In my nightmare...we were all killed...all meaning my Clique
It was gruesome aight the way most of you died...
Let me just list out the ways each of you died...
Starting with...
Faan : Trying to photograph the clawed beast , stabbed through the back and disembowled , body consumed
Alex : limbs ripped before being torn in half
Chris : died in the toilet , claw up the anus (sorry dude ~.~'')
Sam : torn clean down the middle
Khair : head smashed against the wall
Ani : swallowed whole by monster
Serene : Died in lift after cable snapped
Lulu : bell too noisy , attracted a horde , dismembered and disemboweled
Me : Pathetically died trying to jump on one of the monsters , jumped off roof with a sword (yes it magically appeared) only to get impaled by one of the spikes on the monster
so yeah that's practically it...cant really remember the other shitz
roxaz out...
Reason...no not insomnia...but coz of a nightmare...(a lil childish but yeah o_o)
Since it's Friday now...2 days after my nightmare...i may not remember much of the details despite it being a rather vivid dream...
So i'll summarise what i want and can remember...
In my nightmare...we were all killed...all meaning my Clique
It was gruesome aight the way most of you died...
Let me just list out the ways each of you died...
Starting with...
Faan : Trying to photograph the clawed beast , stabbed through the back and disembowled , body consumed
Alex : limbs ripped before being torn in half
Chris : died in the toilet , claw up the anus (sorry dude ~.~'')
Sam : torn clean down the middle
Khair : head smashed against the wall
Ani : swallowed whole by monster
Serene : Died in lift after cable snapped
Lulu : bell too noisy , attracted a horde , dismembered and disemboweled
Me : Pathetically died trying to jump on one of the monsters , jumped off roof with a sword (yes it magically appeared) only to get impaled by one of the spikes on the monster
so yeah that's practically it...cant really remember the other shitz
roxaz out...
Return of the Rox Factor
8:13 PM - Monday, July 6, 2009
Ok so i have been away from blogging for a very long fucking time
And i am partially sorry about that...because...i was partially lazy and partially busy...
O_O
ANYWAYS...
Recent events that happened in my life ,
-Hip Hop IG
-Club G
-Video Games Live, VGL
-Lost of handphone
-First jamming session with clique
-Kissed a guy, ON THE CHEEKS
Ok so let me slowly and briefly describe each event...
I got into both Hip Hop IG and CLub G =]
CONGRATZ to me on that >=D
VGL has got to be the funnest shit that happened to me right now.
Was deeply awed and mesmerized by their performances
And was blown away by Chrono Cross and Chrono Trigger's orchestral play
Totally did not expect it , was nearly brough to tears T~T
Lost of handphone...sigh...4th time...this time on a bus to bugis...
Bloody uncle wont stop the bus for me despite me chasing it down 2 bus stops
Faggot uncle
First jamming session...O_O
It was awesome alright , a rather impromtu shit...
Khair , Faan , Chris , Cheng , Ani and I skipped school just to jam
It was epic can ?...video up on Facebook so visit my profile aight
Kissed Chris(aka Vincent) on his cheek...it was a dare or dare thing
Should have seen the look on his face...
PRICELESS !!!!!!!!!!! XDDDDDDD
Anyways...now im just awaiting my salary from suntec and for my hair togrow longer so as to be able to cut it to the way i want it to be =]
SO yeah that's basically an update on my life...
Im starting to want to turn this blog into a blog about random shit
~shrugs~ Oh wells we'll see how it goes
Roxaz Out
And i am partially sorry about that...because...i was partially lazy and partially busy...
O_O
ANYWAYS...
Recent events that happened in my life ,
-Hip Hop IG
-Club G
-Video Games Live, VGL
-Lost of handphone
-First jamming session with clique
-Kissed a guy, ON THE CHEEKS
Ok so let me slowly and briefly describe each event...
I got into both Hip Hop IG and CLub G =]
CONGRATZ to me on that >=D
VGL has got to be the funnest shit that happened to me right now.
Was deeply awed and mesmerized by their performances
And was blown away by Chrono Cross and Chrono Trigger's orchestral play
Totally did not expect it , was nearly brough to tears T~T
Lost of handphone...sigh...4th time...this time on a bus to bugis...
Bloody uncle wont stop the bus for me despite me chasing it down 2 bus stops
Faggot uncle
First jamming session...O_O
It was awesome alright , a rather impromtu shit...
Khair , Faan , Chris , Cheng , Ani and I skipped school just to jam
It was epic can ?...video up on Facebook so visit my profile aight
Kissed Chris(aka Vincent) on his cheek...it was a dare or dare thing
Should have seen the look on his face...
PRICELESS !!!!!!!!!!! XDDDDDDD
Anyways...now im just awaiting my salary from suntec and for my hair togrow longer so as to be able to cut it to the way i want it to be =]
SO yeah that's basically an update on my life...
Im starting to want to turn this blog into a blog about random shit
~shrugs~ Oh wells we'll see how it goes
Roxaz Out
A R C H I V E S
wasting my life away
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
November 2007
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
December 2009
November 2010
A F F I L I A T E S
i am anti-social, yeah.
Angela
Ani
Alex
Cheng
Chris
Chriseh
Euodia
Faan
Faizoul
Isya
Khair
Lulu
Shaa
Sean Tay
AnimeCrunch Chat
RoxazCoreX
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